It was 10.34am and the car thought it was 18°C when it moved – and on our way, we stopped at the local pet shop, where I had time to spot Bertie Banana Bark ice cream, tropical nibblots for small animals, bunny fun trees, and cow hooves (amongst the many options always available that dogs can pick to gnaw on) in there; we passed the gradually progressing HS2 work (it started to be built in 2020) – with massive concrete blocks continuing to construct the railway track; and this lavender farm had a man in a fluorescent jacket by the entrance, who directed us (by arm waving) into a parking slot, told us what sorts of lavender they had; and then we got out and went up to what may’ve been a massive and very old garage door.

On the other side of it, I had time to spot lavender shortbread biscuits, and ‘The Book of Magical Living’ available for sale, Mum had hand cream put on her by a man in there, who said they distil lavender in the barn next door; a couple of bathtubs had a lot of very minty smelling greenery sprouting out of them…

…there was a small child in a Hot Wheels t-shirt running around, and another boy clutching a SpiderMan plastic toy. Mum wanted coffee, and a lady with bright orange plaits of hair that went down to her knees was serving it, a very very Jamaican looking woman had a polkadotted hat on; and we moved at 11.25am – and had our hands stamped by a wooden counter before entering a field (with a board saying ‘NO DRONES’ and ‘NO FLOWER PICKING’ on it):

An ice cream bike wasn’t being used, a tiny blue desk sort of structure had random unidentifiable bits in it, a tractor was nearby, and then rows and rows and rows of lavender had a small wooden ring/archway in front where a couple of Whippets posing with their owner for a photo, and what may’ve been another Whippet was in a cage sort of structure on wheels being transported somewhere.

The field of lavender was gradually progressed across while I frantically photographed insects; I could see yet another HS2 construction crane in the distance, and a wasp like insect landed on my arm and appeared to want to stay there, despite the sweatiness.

Rows and rows of rosemary came before what may’ve been a vineyard, meaning I wondered if the word wine came from vine (back at home I discovered the etymology was that it was derived from the Old English word ‘wīn’ – and had German origins: early tribes in Germany adopted it from the Latin word ‘vīnum’, which goes back to the Ancient Greek ‘oinos’; likely to have originated from an ancient Middle Eastern or Caucasian term that spread across the Mediterranean with the start of the trade of grape cultivation)…

I was told there were two hundred thousand lavender plants in the field (and then after writing it down I forgot who told me that); and we progressed across the rows of tiny green grapes while with all sorts of buzzing insects audible, until a bench with a ‘DANGER – DEEP WATER’ sign on the back got sat on by Mum and Uncle – overlooking a big pond/small lake with a duck house floating on it…

… by which time the sun was making me sweat more, and then the rows of lavender got progressed back across as well, and butterflies continued to flutter and distract me.

Back at home, pieces of cranmarmwell tart (one of my accidental recipes – this one involves cranberry sauce and marmalade was developed when a bakewell tart attempt couldn’t be filled with the usual filling) were offered out, a bit of ice cream was presented to Uncle and I, Mum poked her tablet and looked up what cheesecloth is (it’s a lightweight, loosely woven cotton gauze originally designed for cheesemaking; and is used in cooking and baking for straining liquids (like nut milks or stocks), draining yogurt, bundling herbs, and roasting poultry) and I was briefly distracted from consuming it when a program being listened to meant that gardeners using electric toothbrushes to grow more tomatoes got learnt about. Then Google decided to mention the Clacton by-election – which was noticed by us due to the 34 candidates including 3 for the Monster Raving Looney Party: Nick the Incredible Flying Brick, Howling Laud Hope, and Baron Von Thunderclap (and the current party leader saying that if any candidate gets too many votes, they will be kicked out of the party on the grounds that they have not been sufficiently looney); and when supper cooking began, some reporting being done on TV that I saw was about fungus, describing the ‘hat thrower fungus’, how it disperses it’s spores, and how they’ve evolved to become poisonous to humans – and the man presenting seemed to have a serious obsession with mushrooms.